For Stefany Valentine, growing up meant living with the ache of absence—an emptiness shaped by the mysterious and painful disappearance of her birth mother, Meiling. After being separated at the age of five due to her parents’ divorce, Stefany spent years wondering where her mother had gone, what had happened to her, and why no effort seemed to be made to reconnect.
Over time, she was led to believe that her mother had neglected the family or even posed a danger to them. Yet the memories from Taiwan, hazy as they were, never quite matched that narrative. Something didn’t add up.
As years passed, the image of Meiling began to fade. Stefany Valentine and her siblings grew up in the United States, leaving behind their Taiwanese culture, language, and maternal identity. Their father remarried, and Stefany’s new stepmother, Cindy, eventually adopted the children after their father passed away from colon cancer in 2006.
The loss of both her parents—one through silence and one through death—left Stefany Valentine grappling with a profound sense of displacement. Writing became her escape, a way to explore feelings too complex to express aloud. Through daydreams and stories, she found solace, and slowly, a path toward self-expression began to emerge.
Writing Her Way Toward Healing
Stefany Valentine’s debut novel First Love Language began as a fictional exploration of what she thought would be a final goodbye to her birth mother. The book tells the story of Catie, a Taiwanese-American teenager and adoptee trying to reconnect with her culture by learning Mandarin.
As Stefany poured her emotions into the character of Catie, the act of writing became not only therapeutic but transformative. She approached the project as a form of closure, convinced that her mother was likely dead after years of unsuccessful searching and even assurances from psychics that there was no hope.
But life had a surprise in store. On New Year’s Eve of 2023, a twist of fate reignited the hope Stefany thought she had extinguished. Her sister-in-law called her with an unexpected message: a woman in their Mormon church, who had grown up with Meiling in Taiwan, had offered to help find her.
After 25 years of silence, disbelief, and grief, Stefany Valentine received a text from her long-lost mother. The initial messages were cautious but warm, and though some of Stefany’s siblings were hesitant to engage, she couldn’t turn away from the possibility of a reunion. With support from Cindy—who worked at Delta and arranged the travel—Stefany booked a flight to Taiwan for the summer.
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Landing at Taiwan Taoyuan International Airport, Stefany Valentine was overcome with emotion. She had wondered whether she would recognize her mother in a crowd, but the moment she saw Meiling, all uncertainty vanished.
“It was just so good to hug her for the first time,” she recalled through tears. “I needed that hug.” That embrace marked the start of an emotional two-week journey, not just across a country, but across time, memory, and healing.
The Miracle of a Second Chance
Reuniting with Meiling was more than just a personal milestone—it was the resurrection of a connection thought forever lost. Meiling, now 57, had suffered deeply after being cut off from her children. Language barriers, lack of income, and cultural disorientation made it nearly impossible for her to stay in touch after the divorce.
“I almost collapsed,” Meiling confessed. “It was unfair treatment.” She had tried to find her children but was left powerless by circumstances beyond her control. Seeing Stefany Valentine again after all those years was overwhelming, but deeply gratifying.
The physical resemblance between mother and daughter struck them both. Stefany, who had often believed she looked “too white” compared to her siblings, was stunned to see just how much she looked like Meiling.
“We look like twins,” she said, noting that the similarity wasn’t about race—it was about features. Meiling, too, was taken aback: “She had grown up and looked so much like me, which touched me.”
During the trip, Stefany Valentine and Meiling made up for lost time. They went hiking, wandered through street markets, and even spent a night together in an aquarium—one of many new memories created to replace the silence of the past. They celebrated Meiling’s birthday with a cake, and Stefany was moved when her mother told her it was “the best birthday [she’d] had in 20 years.”
A deeply meaningful moment came during the second week of the trip when Cindy flew to Taiwan to meet Meiling. Stefany had braced herself for the worst, fearing resentment or conflict between the two maternal figures. But what unfolded was an unspoken handshake of respect.
Meiling thanked Cindy for raising her children, and Cindy, in turn, acknowledged Meiling for giving birth to them. They shared a hot pot meal, and for Stefany Valentine, the moment symbolized something much greater than forgiveness—it was a coming together of two women who had each played crucial roles in her life.
Visiting Taiwan also ignited Stefany’s desire to reconnect with her roots more deeply. Practicing Mandarin online while writing First Love Language had already sparked an interest in the language, but being back in Taiwan solidified her decision to take her studies further.
She applied and was accepted into Chung Yuan University, where she plans to begin studying in the fall. Fittingly, the advance from her novel will help pay for her tuition. The same book that had been her emotional farewell became the bridge that brought her home.
Finding Purpose Through Reconnection
Stefany Valentine’s journey has come full circle in more ways than one. Once an adoptee with no closure, she now sees herself as someone with a mission—to uplift other adoptee voices and bring visibility to their stories. She’s already contributed a short story to the young adult anthology When We Become Ours, and she’s more determined than ever to use her platform to support others like her.
Her next goal is to write a memoir. But Stefany Valentine doesn’t want it to be just her story—she wants to tell Meiling’s story as well. She understands that the past is filled with nuance, miscommunication, and missed opportunities. Her memoir will be a joint effort to give both voices the space they deserve, to explore the complications of family, culture, separation, and healing.
She’s also working to help reconnect her mother with the rest of her siblings, using her growing fluency in Mandarin and her cultural understanding as a bridge between two worlds. She knows not every sibling may be ready, but she hopes to create a path forward for them when they are.
“I’ve already lost her once,” Stefany says. “And I don’t want regrets.” For her, the second chance she’s been given is a miracle—one she doesn’t take lightly. She’s determined to make every moment count.
The woman who once believed her mother was dead now sees her not just as part of her past, but as a vital part of her present and future. Through words, Stefany has reclaimed her story, rewritten her ending, and opened a door to a new beginning. Her novel began as a goodbye—but life had other plans. Now, Stefany and Meiling are writing their next chapter together.